This Best Meditation Practice By My Relationship Counselor Boosted My Sexual Intimacy In Only 2 Weeks
My partner and I have been married for 23 years. We both married at a pretty early age and have practically spent all our lives dealing with the ups and downs and the highs and lows of the marriage.
However, we had never anticipated consulting a relationship counselor for improving our sexual relations.
Let’s get it straight. A physical and sexual relationship is the core pillars of any successful marriage along with other things such as friendship, understanding, maturity, etc.
We were in our early 20s when he had decided to get married because we were two kids crazily in love. We used to joke how we would never end up like our parents who practically had forgotten their roles as husband and wife and only considered themselves as mother and father.
It is highly unfortunate how couples let go of their needs and desires when the children come. Of course, priorities will change and there will be little or no time to get it going in the bedroom but as long as you both find your way back to each other marriage can work happily.
Sadly, for us, we had become just like our parents. Our entire day revolved around our children and at night we would be dead tired to even hold hands and ask each other ‘how was your day?’
The lack of communication and physical intimacy naturally started taking a toll on our marriage and we reached a point where we could not even look eye to eye.
None of us ever said it loud but we felt painfully bored and weary of each other’s presence. I will admit that it is one of the lowest points of my life.
I loved my wife dearly. She was my best friend and the only woman I truly loved and wanted to get married to. The love and adoration we had for each other never left and that is what encouraged us to seek the help and support of a relationship counselor.
We are all living super busy lives especially when you are living in a metropolitan city like Los Angeles that is always buzzing. The constant rush, the multitasking, and the stress levels became huge barriers that prevented us from creating satisfying physical relationships with each other.
Even when we were engaged in intimate moments our minds could not help but wonder about our next day’s schedules and how we are way past our bedtime and will only receive a total of 5 hours of sleep.
We were always in our heads and the constant chatter in our heads just made our sex life boring and dull.
Hence, we thought that it would be best to talk it out with a relationship counselor.
Our relationship counselor helped us to explore our feelings and thoughts about this lack of intimacy that was affecting our relationship. It was astonishing to realise that my wife felt the same way. If only we had communicated her feelings to each other we would have understood earlier how to satisfy each other as husband and wife.
When my wife and I were on the same page, the relationship counselor guided us about how meditation can make us more mindful during sex and increase our satisfaction.
The aim of the meditation practice was to clear the constant chatter of our minds and give ourselves completely to the present moment.
It is normal to feel stressed or even get a bit distracted while you are engaged in intimate relations with your partner. Therefore, meditation practice can help in reducing stress levels and allow you to feel the sensations, and the touch of your partner more deeply.
Our relationship counselor ensured that we feel safe and comfortable in discussing these things. She created a safe space where we could shed our inhibitions and stereotypes and be honest about our needs and desires.
Here are a few important pointers given by the relationship counselor about how you can meditate to boost your sexual intimacy and turn up the heat in your relationship:
Meditate during the day even if it is for just 5 minutes.
It is generally suggested to meditate before you engage in physical intimacy with your partner. However, our relationship counselor educated us about the importance of making meditation a daily practice.
“When you meditate on a daily basis your mind will become more open and flexible. Regular breathing exercises will train your mind to instantly tune into a state of calmness and mindfulness every time you begin to meditate.
It will also reduce your stress levels and improve your stamina and give you greater energy to focus on each other’s desires”
Following the guidance given by our relationship counselor, my partner and I have started meditating on a regular basis. It has really helped us to stay in the present and lower our inner critics and constant chatter.
Meditate Together & Communicate With Your Eyes
This one technique given by the relationship counselor has worked wonders for us.
Sit in front of each other in a comfortable position. Begin with your breathing exercises and tune into a state of relaxation.
As you are doing the breathing exercises, visualize your own body. Pour positive affirmations into your mind.
“I honor my body the way it is”
“I am not afraid of owing my needs and desires”
“My body feels safe and respected with my partner”
After that, you can visualize your partner and repeat the affirmations again.
“I honor my partner’s body”
“My partner and I feel comfortable in showing our vulnerability”
“We share a safe and respectful space”
You can add affirmations of your own too related to what you feel matters the most or is acting as a barrier to creating a mind-blowing physical relationship with your partner.
Vibe To Relaxing Music
Our relationship counselor explained how it is not always possible to meditate on your own. There could be many intrusive thoughts that could be holding you back.
In such circumstances, you can our relationship counselor suggested that we could use external sources to create a state of relaxation and calmness.
Relaxing music or any type of music that puts you and your partner in the mood can be a great facilitator in establishing a sexy bond between the two of you.
Using candles with a sensual smell and having an optimal room temperature can also be effective boosters.
The whole process of meditating individually and together has actually improved our sexual life. We are able to satisfy each other on a deeper and spiritual level.
I remember how the other day my wife said something that made me feel like I was on top of the world.
She said, “You know Kartik when we got married, we had a great sex life, and then somewhere the steam just blew off. But I must say that what I am experiencing right now is almost on a soul level. You touch my soul. You are just fantastic”
It was incredible to hear this from my wife and I can truly see our marital bond getting stronger than ever!