12 Tips For Balancing Your Career and Motherhood.
We see a lot of comparison going on between a working mother and a stay-at-home mother. This comparison is unfair for both sides because every mother wants the best for her kids. Our society has built a narrative that the best situation is when the mother stays at home and the father goes to work!
But let me tell you moms can be the best leaders, employees, and co-workers and also the best mother and wives at the same time. Women are more than capable of balancing a career and motherhood. All they need is the support of loved ones, a bit of inner strength and they are ready to soar far and high.
While creating a perfect work-life balance may feel like a distant dream, here are savvy habits that would help to balance a career and motherhood.
1. Creating Work-Life Balance.
When you are with your children, be fully present. Focus on quality time over quantity. It is possible that you are around your kids all day long but never fully present. When you are at home make sure that you are fully present and attentive.
As a working mom, you should focus on spending quality time with your children. Put the laptop and phones aside and spend some time playing with your kids. On the other hand, give your work your full attention while you are there. Learning to say “No” is important for balancing a career and motherhood efficiently.
2. Shared Parenting.
Shared parenting is when both parents take equal responsibility for housework and the kids. As a working mom, you may find it difficult to do the household chores all alone. Putting too much on your platter will give you a stomach ache, so take the help of your partner.
Divide the work with your partner. There are various ways you can do this. Maybe he can pick up the laundry on his way home from work and help you with the dishes. Be understanding and appreciative when your partner does his best to follow through.
3. Build Support System Around You.
Every stage in your child’s life will need different outputs and efforts from you. It will be easier for you if you have the support of your friends and family. You can ask a family member or a friend to babysit when you and your partner decide to go on a date night. Similarly, you can connect with other working moms who are willing to support each other emotionally, mentally, and in other creative ways possible.
4. Saying Yes to New Opportunities.
By looking at people around you it might feel that they have an advantage over you as they don’t have commitments as you have. Stop downplaying your potential just because you are a mother now. Repeat this affirmation- “being a mom helps me to be a better person, a better employee, and a better leader”.
Motherhood helps you bring unique soft skills like compassion, empathy, and resilience to the table. Allow yourself to take on the new assignment if that is what you desire. For thriving in your career and as a mother, knowing when to say “Yes” is as important as saying “No”.
5. Overcoming Mom Guilt.
Do you find yourself tearing your hair out because you feel are not “perfect” like other moms? Comparing your journey of motherhood will trigger guilt feeling. You are unique and your circumstances cannot be compared with anyone so you get to create your path. Do not let the people shame you. You can ace at handling a career and motherhood at once. Don’t let people tell you otherwise.
6. Breaking Through The Myths.
You will probably hear myths like – Working moms neglect their families and children;
Working moms are selfish; Working moms aren’t as committed to their work as others; Working moms have a hard time managing things and are always stressed; Working moms are miserable; Working moms look down upon stay-at-home moms.
Do not fall into the trap of these myths. You are the best and you are capable of creating and maintaining a thriving family and work environment at once!
7. Planning Carefully and Well Ahead.
Before leaving home for work you have to ensure that your child is placed in a safe and nurturing child care facility. The safety of your child should be the topmost priority. It is also important for your child to get nurturing and thriving environment as cognitive faculties start to develop at a young age. Select a childcare giver who has widespread knowledge, experience, and required documentation.
Try to plan a night before the things you have to do the next day. Make full use of technology. Keep yourself organized with the help of Calendar, Google Keep, and other apps.
8. Make Time for Self-Care.
Let me narrate the story of my friend Neeta. Neeta had two toddlers and provided everything for them. She worked in a restaurant and also managed her home. At the end of the day, she found herself angry, overwhelmed, and frustrated as she couldn’t enjoy “me time”. She realized that this bubbling resentment had the potential of ruining her family. Neeta set an intention of prioritizing herself and started working on her long-lost passion of running in marathons. She understood that ‘self-care is not selfish.
When you see her now she is happy and thriving. She is providing for her family from a place of confidence and contentment. She says the mantra for her happiness is – “I keep my cup full because I cannot give to others what I don’t have for myself”.
9. Frank Communication With Your Partner.
Cultivate a supportive ecosystem at home. If you want your partner’s support you have to be supportive of his needs and aspirations as well. Supportive partners encourage you to be the best version of yourself. Supportive partners don’t shy away from doing their share of work.
There will be times when you will have to renegotiate, sit across the table, and talk about the issues that concern you both. Transparency and understanding will help you sail your boat even in the rough times.
10. Frank Communication At Work.
It is important to know the work culture of your office. Is your firm supportive of new mothers? Do you feel comfortable talking about genuine issues of your family at your work?
At the same time, your children and family need to understand that you have commitments at work. Let your children know when you have an important issue to deal with at work. And you are probably going to miss the birthday party, but you will be there for the next one. When your workplace is flexible with you then you should give justice to the work as well.
11. Do Not Hesitate to Take Professional Help.
If you are unable to cope and need support then do not hesitate to seek professional help. I admit is working and handling a home at the same time isn’t easy. Being committed fully and juggling between a career and motherhood is an arduous task. But it doesn’t have to be this way. Don’t feel you are alone.
12. Ditch The Labels- You Are An Awesome Mom.
You know that you are doing your best. No one has it all figured out so stop trying to be perfect.
Running after perfection will exhaust you and will make you unhappy. This will affect your parenting also. It does not matter if you are a working mom or stay-at-home mom, allow yourself to spread your wings and do what you love. Acknowledge all the great things you have done to come this far.
Best Of Two Worlds.
You want to be the best mom and you also want to do justice to your work. You want to care for your children and follow your dreams. You are unique and your circumstances cannot be compared with anyone so you get to create your path.
Do not let the people shame you. You can ace at handling both your family and your job at once. Don’t let people tell you otherwise. By showing that you can handle a career and motherhood you are demonstrating to your children what an empowered woman looks like. Yes, the challenges will come but you will handle them like you always did.
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