Gayatri’s Warrior-like Spirit That Completely Changed Her Life
A warrior is not someone who is never wounded on the battlefield. A warrior is someone who picks herself up no matter how many times she has fallen. The blows of life can often get brutal but after every hurricane, there comes a rainbow that makes the fight worthwhile. Gayatri was on the verge of losing her battle when something sparked hope in her dull life. She used that spark to create a fire within her that never dies.
The editor of Holistic Living asked Gayatri a thought-provoking question, ‘Which incident changed your life?’ This is her story.
I am Gayatri, a doting mother of a beautiful 3 years old baby girl. . I want to share my story because I know that just like me there are many women out there who are struggling with infertility and bearing the painful treatments that may or may not allow them to experience the joy of motherhood.
I have been trying to become a mother for 10 years. There are no words to express the internal turmoil and the physical challenges that I survived on my journey to motherhood. I have screamed in pain, felt numb and hopeless at times, and even cursed God for depriving me of the one thing I truly wished for.
To give you some context here. My husband and I have been trying for a baby for 10 years. I have gone through a total of four IVF treatments and even planned for surrogacy but nothing ever turned out in our favor. All of my IVF treatments failed and the woman who agreed to be our surrogate backed out all of a sudden. The process of IVF is highly painful. The sharp needles and the million medicines are still nothing compared to the uncertainty of whether or not the outcome will be successful. Going through 4 IVF treatments with no results is a heartbreak too much to bear. I was angry, depressed, and helpless. I felt like a failure as a woman and a wife. I completely shut down, resigned from my job, and spent all my time at home doing absolutely nothing.
My 45th birthday was probably the most depressing day of my life. I woke up with a heavy heart because the realization dawned upon me that every birthday is another year less without a child in my arms. I was frozen in my bed and I refused to get up at all. My state was so worse that I even urinated on my bed and still did not care about the mess I was lying in.
My husband was stricken with worry and could not figure out how to snap me out of my misery. He decided to seek professional help and consulted a psychologist. When I refused to cooperate with that as well, he simply put the laptop near me so at least I could hear what the psychologist was saying. For the first few days, I gave no response. However, with constant support and encouragement, I got a grip on myself and felt myself coming back to life.
After 3 months of therapy, I was in a much more stable state of mind. I understood that life presents us with many choices and opportunities. My rigidity and stubborn attitude never allowed me to get an alternative perspective. With gradual changes in my, thinking patterns, I began to explore the possibility of adoption. I discussed with my husband the idea of adoption. Initially, we were skeptical about it because I wanted a child of my own. However, when I visited one of the adoption centers and saw the lovely smiling faces, my heart melted and I knew that God had decided a path that was much more fulfilling and purposeful.
We began the process of adoption, and finally, on 2nd November 2020, I held my baby in my arms for the first time. I held her gently to my chest and when she clutched my hair with her little hand, my heart was filled with a love I have never felt before. I was overjoyed and in awe of my baby and how everything can just change in a single moment.
A mother is a mother regardless of how the child was born. I suffered a lot before Gia came into my life. The painful treatments, the emotional turmoil, the pressure of society, everything just crumbled when I held her in my arms.
P.S we name her Gia because it means God’s gracious gift, and she is the most precious gift God has blessed me with.
Kudos to Gayatri for not letting bad circumstances take control of her life. She got up, brushed off her disappointments, and took charge of her life! Her journey is certainly awe-inspiring and we urge all the amazing women to tune into their power and be the warrior that they are!
Never Miss Out On The Beauty Of Life. Jiyo Zindagi Dil Khole Ke!
