Expert Relationship Counsellor At Holistic Living Gives The Best Love Advice You Will Never Get
There is a famous line in Beauty and Beast. ‘I let her go because I love her’
This one line captures the essence of true love. When you love someone truly you accept them for who they are and want what is best for them.
However, I have seen many relationships where love is treated like a transaction. In such relationships, love exists only when the opposite person keeps you happy or agrees with you on everything.
The moment there is a disagreement or something upsetting happens you start questioning everything.
This is especially true in young couples. At least, in my 30 years of experience as an expert relationship counsellor that is what I have observed.
I have seen divorces and separations for reasons that have honestly shocked me. Of course, if you are not happy then by all means end the relationship but at least first give a fair chance to make it work.
They just lift their hands up and say this is not what I want. What about the times when you wanted it?
I am not saying drag a toxic or unhappy relationship. But understand that there will be times when you don’t like your partner. That is normal.
They will annoy you. You will get bored of them. There will be disagreements. That is all part and parcel of loving someone.
You cannot pack your bags at every little minor inconvenience. True love is bracing those storms together.
Sometimes it is waiting patiently while your partner deals with their own storm.
I had this beautiful couple, Mahima and Jay. Mahima had recently delivered her second baby and was going through postpartum depression.
The best part was that they both wanted to come for relationship counseling together. Jay wanted to understand how he can support Mahima and that intention itself was beautiful.
Of course, by the end of the therapy, Mahima was much better. She started feeling like her usual self. They say that I helped them but honestly, it was just the love they shared for each other that helped them overcome the storm.
Jay and Mahima were also more open to honest conversations and actually listening to each other. These two skills can go a long way in a marriage. In fact, I believe that it can be a total deal breaker in a relationship.
Falling in love can be effortless but staying committed to that love requires a lot of work.
The expert relationship counsellor continues, she says that couples who grow old together will tell you that love is nothing about being patient with each other. It is about bringing the best out of them but at the same time accepting their worst.
In my 30 years of practice as an expert relationship counsellor, I have seen many couples who could not even see eye to eye. But after honest communication and acceptance, they could clear the negativity that was stuck in their mind and see each other again with the same love and respect.
So, yes, true love is something you create together. It is overcoming all the storms that were meant to tear you’ll apart. It is about accepting the reality of your partner instead of forcing them to change.
Moreover, it is about recognizing your own toxic traits and continually working on your individual self. You have to challenge your own mindset and be observant about how your actions are affecting the relationship.
True love is a feeling you get when you come home from a long tiring day. And that my friend is the key to forever relationships, concludes the expert relationship counsellor at Holistic Living