What Is Your Parenting Style?
One of the fascinating aspects of parenting is the wide range of approaches we use to raise our children. At the same time, there are significant similarities between parents. In fact, there is enough overlap that academics have attempted to categorize parents into four distinct parenting styles.
Your parenting style is the set of tactics you employ to raise your children. Diane Baumrind’s work in the 1960s established one commonly-referenced taxonomy of parenting styles. Baumrind parenting styles are distinguished by their names and characteristics:
-Disciplinarian or Authoritarian
-Indulgent or permissive
These Baumrind parenting styles are centred on the United States, and it is unclear how well these styles describe parents across cultures. Each parenting style differs in at least four ways: discipline, communication, nurturing, and expectations. Do you want to know how to identify your personal style? You may also be wondering, “What exactly is authoritative parenting?” or “Should I be more disciplined or indulgent?” Continue reading to find out more.
PARENTING STYLES IN BAUMRIND: FOUR TYPES OF PARENTING
Authoritarian parents are frequently regarded as disciplinarians.
They employ a harsh punishment method with limited room for bargaining. Punishment is often used.
The majority of communication is one-way: from parent to child. Typically, rules are not clarified.
This type of parent is often less nurturing.
Expectations are high, and there is little room for error.
Permissive or indulgent parents typically let their children do whatever they want, with little guidance or direction. They resemble friends more than parents.
Their approach to discipline is the polar opposite of strict. They have little or no regulations and primarily allow youngsters to solve problems on their own.
Communication is open, but rather than giving direction, these parents allow their children make their own decisions.
Parents in this category are typically warm and nurturing.
These parents’ expectations are often low or non-existent.
Parents who are uninvolved give their children a lot of independence and normally stay out of their way. Some parents may choose to parent in this manner consciously, but others are less interested in parenting or are unclear what to do.
There is no specific discipline style used. An uninvolved parent lets a child do much of what he wants, most likely due to a lack of information or concern.
Communication is restricted.
This set of parents provides little nurturing.
There are little, if any, expectations placed on children
What does authoritative parenting entail? Authoritarian parents are sensible and nurturing, with high, unambiguous expectations. Children raised by parents with this personality tend to be self-disciplined and independent thinkers. This is regarded to be the best style for youngsters.
Disciplinary rules are well-defined, and the reasons for them are given.
Communication is frequent and tailored to the child’s level of comprehension.
Authoritarian parents nurture their children.
The expectations and goals are high, yet they are communicated clearly. Goals may include feedback from children.
WHAT IS MY PARENTING APPROACH?
Few of us fit cleanly into a single parenting style, but rather use a combination of techniques to raise our children. Consider the four parenting styles as a continuum rather than four different parenting styles. Ideally, we consider our children and what they require from us at various moments in time. While a parent may not normally use an authoritarian parenting style, there may be periods in a child’s life when such style is required. Alternatively, you may know an authoritarian parent who is nurturing, in contrast to the description above.
THINGS THAT AFFECT HOW CHILDREN “TURN OUT”
While it is easier for the family when both parents have the same parenting style, some research indicates that having at least one authoritative parent is better for the child than having two parents with the same, less effective approach.
Of course, parenting style is not the only factor that impacts who children become. Among the numerous other factors influencing a child’s growth are the following:
The temperament of the child and how it “fits” with the parents.
A teacher’s approach to dealing with children, as well as the matching of teaching and parenting styles.
The power of a child’s peer group.
New titles for parenting approaches are being coined nowadays. “Helicopter parenting,” for example, is comparable to authoritative parenting but with a little more participation, or some may say over-involvement, in a child’s life. “Free-range parenting” is similar to uninvolved parenting, but with an intentional decision to encourage greater independent thinking in the best interests of the child.
It can be beneficial to consider where you fall on the spectrum of parenting styles. Taking it a step further, know that any of us, at any moment, with any parenting style, might benefit from the self-reflection that comes with taking a parenting class. Speaking with other parents and a facilitator might be beneficial.