Your need , My need – Striking a balance in the relationship
A relationship is a way in which two persons behave with each other and are connected to each other. The word Relationship has a very broad meaning, but here we are focusing on the relationship between two partners that could be husband-wife, boyfriend-girlfriend, or like couples living-in together.
A healthy relationship is when the partners feel connected to each other, they support each other in each and everything and still make each other independent rather than making dependent on one another. There could be different factors deciding a healthy relationship, but it always depends on the partners to decide their factors or components which make their relationship healthier.
We can discuss the 3 C’s of a healthy relationship. These are Communication, Compromise, and Commitment. All the 3 C’s are interrelated. If you are compromising a lot to commit to a relationship but you are not communicating or speaking it out then that cannot be termed as a healthy relationship. So, for a healthy relationship, all the 3 c’s should be proportionate so that the partner feels happy, desired, needed, and appreciated.
Your need / my need
When a relationship comes to existence, they are bound to clash in many aspects. Like two persons coming from a totally different background, different house cultures, different ethics and so many things in which they differ suddenly come together under one roof, so it’s quite natural to not agree with each other in many aspects. For example, one person’s family would be very traditionally inclined and the other must be having a modern perspective. So, there would be many things they do, say, or follow will not be accepted by the other partner.
Maintaining a balance in the relationship
Maintaining a balance is very important in a healthy relationship. A healthy relationship will certainly make life better. It gives a positive vibe to all around the couple, their immediate family members, their kids, their friends, their colleagues, and so on. Everyone would like to be involved with them and experience peace vibrating because of the positive vibe. A healthy relationship develops self-esteem and confidence thereby strengthening the mental and emotional health of the persons which helps to lead a happy and contented life.
A healthy relationship is when two persons build their relationship by focusing on the following critical dimensions of any relationship –
- Trust: It is the most important factor needed. The partners should have complete faith or trust in each other. That goes a long way in building the connection between them. They should know that whatever happens, their partner will believe and support them.
- Mutual Respect: Another factor for a successful and healthy relationship is mutual respect. They should feel equal in the relationship. In each and every small and big decision partner should always respect each other’s opinions. Also giving attention to each other’s likes /dislikes allows the relationship to develop and improve intimacy and helps them to build a contented and satisfying long-term relationship. It likes you to give respect and you will earn respect. And mutual respect helps and supports a healthy relation
- Generosity: It Strengthens the relationship. It is prioritizing our partner’s needs above other needs. It creates reciprocity. It is like when someone gives us generously, we also want to give them back selflessly. Generosity can be shown in simple things like willingness in sharing all things without any expectations, showing patience, being optimistic, and caring for the welfare of your partner.
- Self-less Love– Selfless love is when the partners unconditionally give their everything to sustain a relationship without expecting anything in return. Self-less love among partners helps you to respect, admire, care, and never hurt, humiliate, or abuse each other.
- Assertiveness: Assertiveness is the ability to stand up for yourself, understanding that your needs are equally important while respecting your partner’s needs. When you are too selfless, you forget your own identity, your own self-worth, and your own needs. In the beginning, you do not even realize that each time you are fulfilling your partner’s need, you are totally neglecting your needs. When that self-realization strikes you and you still you continue to do that as a habit or responsibility, you become upset. So, you must communicate your needs to your partner and should be able to stand up for yourself to maintain a long-lasting healthy and happy relationship for each one of you .
- Communication: Healthy relationship includes open and honest communication. You should be able to openly express your needs and thoughts to your partner to maintain a healthy relationship. One rule which is absolutely necessary to be maintained is whatever clashes or fights you are having with your partner, before you go to sleep, communicate with your partner, and resolve it before you sleep.
- Manage your boundaries: Establishing healthy boundaries allows you to feel comfortable and independent in your relationship and thereby developing their self -esteem. In order to establish boundaries, we should be aware of ourselves and should be very clear in communicating to the partner what you are, what you need, your beliefs, values and your limits, and so on.
A healthy relationship is a vital piece of health and wellbeing of individuals. Work as hard on your relationship as you do on the other things that are important to you. We must balance our needs from others with our own needs and understanding of our self. When we talk about balance, we cannot be too selfish also nor can we be too selfless. In either case, one of the partners will be hurt. When we are too selfish, we are ignoring the needs of our partner and when we are being too selfless, we are not appreciating our individual needs which are also equally important.
So, we need to have a proper understanding of each other needs and should be willing to take a few additional steps to strike a balance in the relationship. As only a strong relationship can lead to a long, healthy, happy, and fulfilling life for each of the partners. For a better understanding of the root cause of your relationship challenges, tune in to our experts – relationship coaches / family coaches / marriage counselors on https://www.theholisticliving.org.in/. Take experts’ help to overcome those challenges in simple ways and start celebrating life together.